TV writer (Conan, Welcome to Flatch), small business owner (my lady business). In accordance with California State Law, here’s the link to my podcast:

Los Angeles
Joined March 2011
Will I get excitement diarrhea for having my infographic published in McSweeney's? What do you think?! mcsweeneys.net/articles/will…
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P.S. the episode I wrote airs tonight on Fox! Starting at midnight on Hulu!
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This is very inside me, but I used to make fake Buzzfeed lists for Conan...and now I'm grateful for this real Buzzfeed list! Welcome to Flatch made their best TV shows of the year! buzzfeednews.com/article/tom…
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Jessie Gaskell retweeted
It’s Spooky Night tonight on @WelcomeToFlatch ! We got psychics, hot hermits and a VERY unlikely new couple! Boo! 9 pm/8 central on @FOXTV, tomorrow on @hulu!
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🎵 These are a few of my favorite things! 🎵
If you like throuples, open houses and chickens on leashes you will love tonight’s @WelcomeToFlatch ! Tonight on @FOXTV, tomorrow on @hulu !
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We’re so lucky that billionaires get involved in politics to help us fix things. They could just sit back and enjoy their money, but no! Their hearts are as big as their wallets 🥰
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Jessie Gaskell retweeted
Welcome to Flatch is Small-Town Life's Answer to the Office. Here's Why You Should Watch tvfanatic.com/2022/10/welcom… (By @indyhobbss)
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"Oh so you're just gonna buy one from CVS then?" -spiders
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Kanye is giving mental illness a bad name.
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The 90s were great because DJs would basically just play a Jock Jams CD and you could grind someone on the dance floor to the lyrics “Come on…it’s a choo choo train”
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Life hack: you can say the worst shit imaginable as long as you follow it up with, “No offense.”
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Ugh that's it, I'm canceling my OPEC+ subscription
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Me, packing my 10 survival items for Alone: “Do you think ‘Everything But the Bagel’ seasoning counts as one item, or eight?”
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The horror movie to Pinterest pipeline
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When there was only one set of footprints…that’s when Jesus forgot this was a shoeless household.
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This is TRUE! Listen to Jenny!
The New York Times just called @WelcomeToFlatch “Funny and surprising”! Don’t miss out! We premiere this Thursday at 9 PM on Fox and Hulu at midnight PST! @FOXTV @LionsgateTV @paulfeig
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The show I’ve been writing on, Welcome to Flatch, premieres TONIGHT on Fox! And Hulu directly after! The entire cast is hilarious and the crew is so talented. Please watch and help me keep a job I love! fox.com/welcome-to-flatch/ #welcometoflatch
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No hated song gets more play than "Hotel California." I'm constantly stuck listening to it. I can check out any time, but I can never leave. Hotel California is my Hotel California
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Yes, iPhone, you’re right. I did mean to type “Happy Bird That.” Thank you for correcting me you ducking pie safe shot
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Sorry my hair looks like shit, I can’t make a hair appointment until I have an hour’s worth of conversation.
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