The Babylon Bee
 @TheBabylonBee

Fake news you can trust.

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Joined February 2016
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Get The Babylon Bee's first three books for one shockingly low price! It's everything you've ever wanted in life. shop.babylonbee.com/collecti…
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Nation Wishes There Were Some Way They Could Have Known About The Hunter Biden Laptop Story Before The Election babylonbee.com/news/nation-w…

Nation Wishes There Were Some Way They Could Have Known About The Hunter Biden Laptop Story Before...

U.S.—The New York Times has confirmed the authenticity of Hunter Biden's laptop story, leaving many Americans wishing there was some way they could have known about this before the 2020 election. 

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99.9% Of Americans Support Sending Mitt Romney To Fight In Ukraine babylonbee.com/news/99-of-am…

99.9% Of Americans Support Sending Mitt Romney To Fight In Ukraine

U.S.—While Americans remain divided over whether we should expand our involvement in Ukraine to direct military intervention, possibly causing the world to descend into a Fallout-style apocalyptic...

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The Babylon Bee retweeted
Kyle Mann @The_Kyle_Mann
Mar 20
It's time for another round of unused & rejected headline submissions by my talented writers at @TheBabylonBee! Here we gooooooo
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Show this thread
Pete Davidson Confirmed As Next James Bond babylonbee.com/news/pete-dav…

Pete Davidson Confirmed As Next James Bond

LONDON—The next actor to take on the mantle of Ian Fleming's beloved character James Bond has been found. EON Productions announced Wednesday that actor/comedian Pete Davidson would be stepping into...

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Follow us for more handy tips to #surviveinflation
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8 Ways To Deal With Inflation If You're One Of Those Poor People Making Under $300K babylonbee.com/news/8-ways-t…

8 Ways To Deal With Inflation If You're One Of Those Poor People Making Under $300K

Inflation can be hard, but no one said this would be easy. We have to band together and sacrifice so that the Democrats can implement their far-left agenda of tearing Western civilization apart...

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#1 - Try foregoing expensive medical care for your dog, cat, or spouse. Sometimes you have to make some tough calls.
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Here Are The Winners Of The Babylon Bee's Women Of The Year babylonbee.com/news/here-are…

Here Are The Winners Of The Babylon Bee's Women Of The Year

Where would we be without strong, independent women? As everyone knows now, a woman is a human person who wears dresses and acts really womanly and stuff. We checked with top scientists and we think...

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The Babylon Bee retweeted
Not the Bee @Not_the_Bee
Mar 19
Mainstream media carried out a massive fake news operation against Virginia Gov. Glenn Youngkin last week and now they're being forced to correct the record notthebee.com/article/media-…

Mainstream media carried out a massive fake news operation against Virginia Gov. Glenn Youngkin...

If you were paying attention to Virginia's mainstream media coverage last week, well, first of all, I'm sorry, that's a deeply unpleasant experience for anyone any day of the week.

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Planned Parenthood Backs New 'Don't Say Baby' Bill babylonbee.com/news/planned-…

Planned Parenthood Backs New 'Don't Say Baby' Bill

NEW YORK—Lobbyists on behalf of Planned Parenthood have introduced a new "Don't Say Baby" bill which will ban any mention of the word "baby" in all abortion debates, hearings, suits, and legislation....

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Report: Go To Church You Heathen babylonbee.com/news/report-s…

Report: Go To Church You Heathen

WORLD—According to a breaking news report, you should go to church, you insolent heathen. The report, released this morning, which is Sunday, the day people go to church, indicated that you are still...

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Zelensky Begs Congress To Bring Back Trump babylonbee.com/news/zelensky…

Zelensky Begs Congress To Bring Back Trump

KYIV—In a stirring address to members of Congress from war-torn Kyiv, Ukrainian President Zelensky begged America’s elected representatives to bring back Trump.

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In Massive Escalation, Zelensky Requests America Send Florida Georgia Line To Play Concert For Russian Soldiers babylonbee.com/news/in-massi…

In Massive Escalation, Zelensky Requests America Send Florida Georgia Line To Play Concert For...

KYIV, UKRAINE—In a shocking move likely to intensify the threat of nuclear war, President Zelensky took the unprecedented step of asking Congress to send Florida-Georgia Line to play a concert for...

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The Babylon Bee Guide To The Founding Fathers babylonbee.com/news/the-baby…

The Babylon Bee Guide To The Founding Fathers

Did you know that there exists a country called The United States of America and that some people "founded" it? That's right! But now we know you're wondering who these racist white men are. So were...

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